Friday, December 21
“Hi Brenda,
“I am going to pick up Tom around 1 tomorrow if that works for you,” JB emailed.
“As for the documents, as I said, I'd appreciate if I could respond right after Christmas. I need a little more time to think.
“As I read the waiver, it seems very one sided. Read it and ask yourself if you'd sign it as written in my shoes. I am not completely opposed to sharing counsel and am all for saving money, but it has to be impartial for me to be comfortable. Right now it doesn't feel that way.
“Also, filing says we've been separated for 6 mos which we both know isn't true. Did your lawyer say that is common practice?
“I have been making a list of what items are important to me and which I don't care as much about. Assume you are doing the same. I'd be happy to discuss with you informally but if you'd prefer to wait and do so formally I understand.
“Have you told the boys that you've taken this step? It would be helpful to know since I'll be seeing both this weekend.
“See you tomorrow.”
“The boys know we're getting divorced,” I responded. “Having Tom from 1-9 is fine.
“The waiver is worded that way because I hired the lawyer. It's boiler plate.
“The living separate and apart: we've been living separate and apart for the entire time you've been committing adultery. Here’s what the attorney wrote when I asked her about this.
‘Brenda:
‘The separation date does not reflect the actual physical moving out date, rather it is the date the marriage became dead and normal cohabitation ceased. This would include adultery as one example of abnormal cohabitation. The law requires the marriage to be over for 2 years but reduces the time to 6 months under irreconcilable differences with a signed waiver from both parties. You may continue to live in the same house while the marriage is dead. There is no waiting period for adultery.’”
Matt began texting me about how miserable he is in his marriage.
“Go to therapy with your wife and get brutally honest,” I responded.
“Or have an affair.”
“Affairs are for liars and cowards.”
“You think? How about cheaper than a divorce.”
“Not in the long run.”
“Well, just can’t confess.”
“You really don’t want to talk to me about affairs and not confessing.”
“I know. Sorry. Don’t judge me please.”
“I have visions of slamming the base of my palm up JB’s nose and watching him die.”
“Wow, I better stay away.”
“Don’t let you and your wife get where I am.”
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