Monday, May 20
Pia showed up at the barn while I was grooming BlackJack. My plan was to saddle BlackJack and let him graze in the outdoor arena while I took my scheduled call with Yosef then ride. Pia saddled Jimbo and followed me out to the arena.
“I have a call with my Kabbalah teacher in a few minutes,” I told her, hoping she'd begin riding.
Pia let Jimbo graze, too, and listened while I dialed Yosef and began discussing soulmates.
“If the person isn’t the right one for me,” I told Yosef, “I don’t want to bother. I don’t want to spend time or emotions on someone who’s wrong, you know?”
“Only the best,” Yosef agreed. “Why waste your time? Ask the Light to come into this.”
Yosef told me to scan a section of the Zohar known for helping people find their soulmates.
“About the red string,” I said. “Why should I wear it if I already believe the Light is protecting me? It feels superstitious.”
“It’s just another tool. It’s a powerful one. You are protected by the Light, but if you have a good tool that would reinforce that protection, why wouldn’t you use it? It’s not superstitious.
“It’s like the mizuza,” Yosef continued. “The mizuzas are very powerful forms of protection. You should have one on every door to your house. First on the outside doors to protect you from negative forces, then for your bedroom doors to protect you and your children while you sleep. You should really do this. I will email your contact information to the woman who provides the mizuzas if you want. I think it’s a very good idea. They’re expensive, but the people who make them fast for twenty-four hours and spend all day focused on writing scrolls they insert into the mizuzas. They don’t talk, they don’t eat, they focus all energy on the scrolls.”
I told Yosef I wanted two.
After our Give Peace a Dance adventure and listening to this conversation, Pia probably thinks I’m nuts. We got on our horses and Nicole called. I didn’t answer and listened to her voicemail later.
“Hello Brenda, this is Nicole (pause). I guess you don’t want to hear from me (pause). I don’t know what I did. I wish you’d give me a phone call back (pause). Tonight (pause). It would mean a lot (pause). You have a nice great day (pause). With the kids and everything (pause). Love you always. Hope to talk to you but if I don’t, remember I always loved you. Bye-bye.”
I texted Nicole. “I love you. Always will. You know I don’t talk to you when you’re messed up. Call me when you’re sober.”
“How are you?” Golf Guy texted.
“I’m good, how are you?”
“I’m good. Just finished coaching a baseball game. It’s kinda like Bad News Bears.”
“I went to the driving range and did well—for me.”
“Nice job! Do you want to get together sometime?”