Tuesday, September 20, 2016

In The Beginning... I ("Thank You Ashley Madison" intro excerpt 1)

     Once upon a time, two sparks of consciousness twinkling in ethereal vastness chose to become human. Like other sparks, they were shiny threads in divine fabric wanting to experience, evolve, love, share, and gain information for the consciousness system they pulsed in. Most had become human before and there was excitement as the sparks invented obstacles and opportunities to transform, become divine as possible in human form.
     The two sparks agreed to pair up. They made a pact to push each other to greatness. They chose to be born to white, middle-class, Illinois families and the first to arrive was JB. JB chose parents who were intellectual alcoholic artists. His mother was a painter, his dad a writer. They’d already had three children and JB was the last. A year and five days later, Brenda showed up. She’d picked a super religious farmer’s daughter for a mother and a street-smart ex-hood for a father.
     JB’s parents threw fancy dinner parties, got drunk, and cheated on each other. JB’s mother, Therese, often screamed at her numbed-out husband, Bob, and JB would wring his hands and rub them together. His brother and sisters began calling him Uncle Joe. JB’s teacher told Therese that JB was disturbed and needed therapy, and Therese told the teacher she was an idiot and retold the story, which she found ridiculous and hilarious, at cocktail parties while JB drew gory war pictures in his room.
     Brenda’s mother, Cherise, was a full-time mom who read Seventh-day Adventist literature, went to church, and mostly kept to herself unless she was with her sisters. Brenda’s father, Carl, a high school dropout, owned the printing company he began working for as a delivery boy. Carl kept himself busy on the weekends with a twelve-flat apartment building he and Cherise owned. It allowed him to stay away from home and drink with friends. He and Cherise had a deal: he could pretty much do whatever he wanted if he didn’t interfere in their daughters’ religious upbringing.
     Brenda and her younger sister, Trish, went to Seventh-day Adventist parochial school. They couldn’t go to movies, read novels, wear jewelry, dance, and from Friday night sundown to Saturday night sundown, the Sabbath, they couldn’t do anything that wasn’t Bible-related.
     At JB’s, the living room couch hid liquor bottles that were stuffed under it. JB avoided confrontation at all costs and memorized history, trivia, and left-leaning political opinions to impress his parents. It worked.
     As JB learned to present himself well, Brenda developed an angry rebellious streak and began rattling her religious cage.
     JB and Brenda became writers. They got jobs as reporters at sister newspapers. Brenda was dating a South African guy named Gene. She’d recently returned from a trip to South Africa with him and was in the process of dissolving their relationship when JB showed up in the newsroom. Gene had verbally abused Brenda for three years but had recently begun smacking her around. She’d broken up with Gene before, but this time, post beating, she was methodically and slowly severing ties, allowing him to think he might still have a chance because she was afraid of what he might do.


  1. I'm hooked, can't wait for more! Know the "intellectual, alcoholic artist intimately!"
    --Sue G.

  2. WOW ! I'm hooked too ! this is so interesting !! How can i find your first book ? -James

    1. Hi James,
      Thank you! "Diary of an Alcoholic Housewife" is at Barnes & Noble, on Amazon, and can be ordered from my publisher, Hazelden.

  3. I like it, but I especially like the first two paragraphs on the "In the Beginning" page.

  4. I like it, I especially like the first two paragraphs on Sept 20th.

  5. Hi Deborah,
    Thank you. I look forward to more of your comments. I finally figured out how to comment on my own blog. Lol.

  6. Hi Brenda,
    I'm late to this blog but wow! I have lots of opinions. I'm glad I'm not in it, just like your first book. I'm incredibly sorry for your pain. And I can't wait to hear what happens next. Hope it has horses, happy kids, confusing yet hot sex (after all we want the book to sell) and lots more of Brenda. Keep it going, I'll keep reading and, occasionally, weeping. All my best, Mike

    1. Thank you Mike! Your opinions mean a lot to me, so bring 'em on fellow writer.
      Wishing you all the best, too,

  7. Hi Brenda. I had no idea that looking you up on facebook would bring me here :(
    The first time I read DOAAHW was the spring of 2015 while I was pregnant with my second son. I found your book because I was searching for knowledge to not go back to my bad habits after my baby was born. You became so much more to me, I can still remember the excitement I felt when I read the entries that you have ties with my hometown (Wausau) I felt like you were really speaking to me, and there was a reason I stumbled upon your book.
    Well during that year, when our baby was near 2 months old, I found out my Husband was having an affair. It is the most painful disgusting feeling in the world! I really was not expecting to see this very crap happened to you too.
    I’m going to start catching up on your blog, thank you for inviting me! Honestly I'm kind of afraid of the feelings it's going to stir up in me, but there's also the comfort of knowing you're not alone.
    Peace for now,
    Heidi D.

  8. Hi Heidi,
    "The most painful disgusting feeling in the world," is the perfect description. Well said. You are right, there is comfort in knowing we're not alone. Reading this will probably stir things up for you, but I think in a good way. Writing and editing this book has been great therapy for me. It's been painful, but I've grown a lot and become stronger and wiser for it. I'm actually grateful I had this opportunity to evolve into a better version of myself. I sure as hell wouldn't want to repeat it, however. LOL. Thanks for your comment Heidi.
    Wishing you peace & happiness,